Emerson's birth was nothing short of a miracle.
When we found out I was pregnant and that the baby would be due right around my dad's one year death date, I know that it wasn't just a coincidence. I knew that there was a reason.
So while I was pregnant I often prayed and studied to gain more understanding. One of my answers came when I was reading the talk, The Doors of Death by Russell M. Nelson. In it he said, "The miracle of the Resurrection, wondrous as it will be, is marvelously matched by the miracle of our creation in the first place." That sentence stood out to me. I felt that one of the things I was to learn from the coincidence of Emerson's birth date was that the miracle of birth is marvelously matched by the miracle of the Resurrection.
In order to try for a VBAC, my doctor said that I would have to go into labor on my own. They wouldn't induce me. They also had me schedule a c-section on April 2nd just in case. Since Eva was a week overdue and I never went into labor naturally with her, I was worried that it might happen again.
One Sunday during church I got the impression that I would go into labor on Easter. I didn't even know when Easter was when that inspired thought came into my mind. I was about 6 or 7 months pregnant at the time, so I quickly looked up the dates and saw that Easter was the day after my dad's death date anniversary. I thought how fitting that would be, especially considering what I was learning about the miracle of the resurrection and the miracle of birth.
As time got closer there were many moments I doubted that impression. I was worried that I wouldn't go into labor on my own so I tried everything I could to induce labor naturally. I did acupuncture, ate pineapple and spicy food, drank red leaf tea, tried black and blue cohosh, applied clary sage essential oil as well and evening primrose oil, and I even tried caster oil.
Time moved on and I was still pregnant. However part of me was relieved that I wasn't in the hospital during my dad's death date anniversary. When March 30th finally came, it turned out to be a very beautiful day. I was worried that I would be really sad all day, but it ended up being a sweet, fun filled day with my little family.
We went to the ward Easter Egg Hunt that morning, then Lincoln, Eva and I went to the air and space museum near the Dulles airport in memory of my dad. He went there when he and my mom came to visit and he loved it. Well, Eva loved it too. She ran around the whole time screaming, Airplane! It was adorable. Then that night we went to dinner with some of our favorite friends. It was such a stark contrast from the feelings and emotions of that same day a year ago.
Then on Easter morning around 12:30am I felt my first contraction. I instantly said a silent prayer of gratitude. My Father in Heaven was true to his word. I had received that impression months ago that I would go into labor on Easter and it was fulfilled not even a half an hour after Easter came. I was so happy, and so excited. I couldn't sleep, although I knew that I needed to get some sleep before the contractions would get worse. I finally fell asleep for a couple of hours and woke up around 4am when I was in too much pain to sleep through it. I woke up Lincoln to tell him. And we talked for about an hour. Then we decided to get up and get ready. I took a shower, which was incredibly painful because I could barely stand. Afterwards we called the doctor. I was having contractions every 5 minutes, but they were only 30 seconds long. The doctor said to come in soon (because I had previously had a c-section and they wanted to monitor me) But that I also had a little bit of time. She suggested that I wait until the contractions were 1 minute long, as long as I could still feel the baby moving.
So Lincoln and I decided to go to church... I figured it would be a good distraction. Although I don't know how much I actually got out of the meeting. Every 5 minutes I would have a contraction and have to breath through it. Good thing I was sitting towards the back. Eva then went to nursery, and Lincoln and I went for a walk to see if that would help move things along. Overall I was starting to feel like things were actually slowing down and not progressing. Contractions were now every 8-10 minutes.
We walked to the masonic temple and I ran up and down the stairs about 12 times. It helped trigger more contractions, but they were still not back to every 5 minutes. We then decided to go home, eat lunch and take naps. I was exhausted and figured I would take advantage of the slow labor. I took about a 45 minute nap, when all the sudden I woke up to a very painful contraction and right after my water broke!
We called our friends Tara and Michael to come over because they were going to babysit Eva. We decided to stay a little bit longer at home. I wanted to try laboring in different positions that were supposed to help open my pelvis. Plus, I knew it would be more comfortable laboring at home instead of in the hospital. (I had my bouncy ball at home and it helped a ton!)
The contractions were finally too strong to bear any longer. They were about one minute long and every 4-5 minutes. We went into the hospital around 4:30. I became so grateful we had stayed home as long as we did because they had me attached to a monitor and IV. They checked me and I was at a 6 and about 85% effaced. When they asked if I wanted an epidural I told them that I wanted a VBAC more than anything and would do what it takes. They suggested to wait a little bit longer before I got the epidural to see if I would progress. But, FOUR painful hours later I still hadn't progressed from a 6.
As much as it was not very fun to work through contractions for four hours without any progress, it was those four hours where I really felt close to my dad. Like he was spiritually there helping me and comforting me. But it wasn't just my dad that I felt was there, I think there were many seen and unseen angels helping me during my labor. It was also during those four hours where I really gained a greater understanding of the pain my Savior had to go through. I gained a greater appreciation for the atonement. (As well as a greater respect for all those women in our past who gave birth when there was no such thing as an epidural.)
Since I had not progressed after those fours hours the doctor told me that she wanted to try and put me on Pitocin to help move things along. She also suggested that I get an epidural. SO I did... thank heavens! And I soon moved to an 8 and 100% effaced.
(mid contraction... so much pain)
(in between contractions... happiness)
But soon after the same thing that had happened to Eva was starting to happen with Emerson. He was still pretty high, and every time I had a contraction his heart rate would go down. I was really getting stressed. I didn't want to have gone through all of this and then have it end just like it did with Eva. Another c-section because the baby was still too high and the heart rate was going down.
I was praying like crazy. Pleading with God to help in some way so that I wouldn't have to have a c-section again. Then during one contraction where his heart rate went too low, a bunch of nurses stormed into my room. They had me move from my side, to the other, to my back. But still nothing helped. Then the head nurse suggested that every time I had a contraction to sway my hips quickly from side to side. So I did. The doctor thought it was crazy, and so did the other nurses. They had never seen that happen before, but it started working! It may have looked really weird to be in bed swaying my hips from side to side as fast as I could, but it kept Emerson's heart rate up and it helped move him down and that was a miracle. Finally, two hours later a little bit after midnight the doctor checked me and said that I could start pushing.
I was ecstatic. I was so happy that I would finally have a chance to push. I never got that far with Eva. I was rushing on adrenaline. She warned me that we would only push for about two hours and if the baby didn't progress, that I may end up having a c-section again. I pushed with all the pilates training I could harness :) And after about two or three pushes Emerson had moved down enough and the doctor told me that I would end up having the baby vaginally---no c-setion! I was so happy I could cry. Lincoln then told me that he could see the head and that he had a lot of black hair. I pushed for about an hour total when Emerson came out. As soon as his head came out we saw that he had the cord wrapped around his neck. The doctor quickly cut the cord. Then Emerson came out all the way, hesitated a little and then cried. I instantly felt such a relief. It was so beautiful. Nothing short of a miracle.
The next day my regular doctor came in to meet Emerson. (Since there was another Doctor on call when I gave birth) She was in shock that I had VBAC. She knew how much I had wanted it, and she didn't think I would be able to do it. But she was so happy for me when she found out how things worked out. Even she thought it was a miracle.
There was a point in the hospital where everything was quiet and I had some alone time with Emerson. As I was holding him I became really emotional when I thought of him in Heaven with my dad. I thought of last year during that exact same time when I was getting ready for my dad's funeral. Then the thought of Emerson being there with me spiritually came into my mind. I imagined him there helping me and comforting me through the terrible loss. I then thought of my dad in Heaven sending him off to me. Emerson had been with my dad more recently then I had. I was just overcome with emotion as I thought of my dad sending me his love through little Emerson. I felt like I could see a glimpse to heaven through my newborn baby boy.
And to top it off, Emerson was born on April fools Day. Fitting, for all of our previous April Fools jokes. And if he is anything like my dad, he will be a little jokester. Also, my mom reminded me that she actually went into labor with ME on Easter and I was born the day after Easter back in 1984. Plus, I too had the cord wrapped around my neck when I was born. I really do have a special connection with this boy.
He is a gift.
